Friday, April 29, 2005

just wondering...

Okay....this refers back to when Kevin was able to adopt Tiffany in late 1990. Tiff's bio-dad and I were divorced in 1985, he had visitation available every other weekend, took her 3 or 4 times, then 'poof' he was gone...(thank you, God! The best thing he ever did for her was walk out of her life!), but I still got my $40.00 a week child support...only cuz it was deducted from his check every week, but, who cares why? So, after Kevin and I got married, all of a sudden he called my apartment, and asked if he could come over & get her. Kevin was there at the time, and I told him what d wanted..Kev got on the phone & talked to him, and explained nicely that someday, he'd like to adopt her, would that be okay with him? Well, they talked for a while, ultimately, d said no. So, the next day, we went to my attorney's office, and asked him about it....he said that it would be BEST if d signed something turning over custody, but...when I told him it had been way over a year since he'd tried to even SEE her, the lawyer said, well if that's the case, we don't need his ok! But a couple weeks later, d met us at the lawyer's ofc, signed the paper, and we were good to go! So, after that we had to do all the stuff that children's services required, like a home visit, letters to them (they REQUIRED them!) saying what kind of a positive effect it'd have on her (from 5 friends & bosses, not family!), oh, just all kinds of shit! They even checked the cupboards here to make sure we had food! OMG!! So, that took 9 months for them to okay it, and after that we had to go to court, and a judge had to approve it...however, they DID give Tiff a new birth certificate, that said Kev's her birth father! So,. what I want to know is...why all that, when ANYBODY can just walk in off the street and have a baby, and THEY'RE not questioned like criminals, which, I do know that some of them are!! THEY can just innocently waltz out of there, & nobody asks them SHIT!! Why not?? Just because they're the biological parents, does that give them "rightful ownership"? Does that guarantee that they'll never abuse that child, they''ll take good care of it, and love it forever? Not from what I've seen, anyway! Yeah, okay, it was forever ago, but I can still be bitter about it, can't I?
Bitter BoUnCeS!! (haha) LibbY!

Thursday, April 28, 2005

guess i'm just bored or something...

Well, I'm just thinking again...does anybody besides me believe there are people that look like you & me, that we meet, but they're actually angels? Because, thinking back, there are MANY times that, if it wasn't for them, well, I probably wouldn't even be here now! At least one of them, I never even knew his name, but he happened to be driving past in a black Corvette when my car broke down in the country, one of the times I took Tiff and left her biological dad to 'go home to Mommy'. I remember it perfectly...I'd gotten out of the car, and was just walking around it to get Tiffany out of her car seat, and walk into town with her. So, this really cute guy I'd never seen before (this is a REALLY small town, & I had been here since I was 2...a good 17 years!) pulled up beside us, and got out, & came over, and asked if he could give us a ride to the closest gas station...I said ok, and he put me & Tiff in the car with him, and took us right down the road, and dropped us off. I never ever saw him, again, either. I never even gave any thought to how dangerous that could've been until later. Then once I was up in Findlay, visiting my then boyfriend (who, by the way, was in jail, thank you very much!) with his 3 brothers and a friend of ours named Harold. Well, for some reason, I was on some kind of pain pills for something...we went to a bar and were drinking, and Harold said I drank most of my 2nd beer, and all of a sudden, my head hit the bar! So, thank God for Harold, he drove me all the way home (1 hr), got me up the stairs into my apartment (Tiff was at my mom's), and I fell asleep til the next morning! When I got up the next day, I had no f'nng idea what had happened! But Harold told me, and I took him back to Findlay to get his car. Joe came over to Bucyrus to get me a couple times...were they actually my 'angels'? Hmmmm...then, after Kevin and I got married, her biological dad gave up his parental rights (not that he ever used them, of cours!), and Kevin applied to adopt took 9 months to get approved, but they finally did it! And, from what I can see...he's OUR angel!! + his family! I have so much gratitude, and respect for the fact that he will never, ever leave either of us! I've had lots of friends with ms, whose husbands have stayed a year or two, but when it started to get more noticeable, they were gone! But Kevin & his family have been right behind me, 100%, even WAY more than my own family!!
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

oh yeah....



2 in one day...i

more about a...

...while she worked in the meat dept, she & t, the meat manager, decided they HAD to be together, which was kind of strange, because she had j's baby, & was now living with him, and t, the meat mgr, was married, & had 2 or 3 kids, & he and his wife & kids the Jehovah's Witness religion!! Unfortunately, a was my friend, and she called me at work one day, and said she & t needed to be together and 'talk'. So I, of course, felt bad for her, and said 'you can use my apt...if ya wanna drive south for an hour'. Never thought they'd really do it, even though a came & picked up my key!! I said, jokingly, make sure you leave it down in the mailbox. And when I got off work and went home with Tiff, I'll be damned if that key wasn't in the mailbox!!! So, the first thing I did of course, was change my SHEETS!! The second was to call a, & give her hell for actually doing that!! Told her she was gonna burn in hell for that one!!
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

fun stuff

Once, when I worked up in Fostoria, I became good friends with the girl who worked in the meat dept up there. She was pregnant at the the old produce mgr's (the girl I replaced) boyfriend(....lots more to that too!). So, I was friends for a while with the bulk foods dept mgr, but soon she drove me up the wall...then she left her husband and moved to New England, so that was good (!).
So, a few weeks later, somebody up front yelled "S is here!" I RAN, back to the meat dept, and said "Ya gotta hide me!! S is here!!" Then I crawled under the 'meat wrapping thingy' that A (my friend) worked with, and sat right under it while S was back there asking if they'd seen me, she couldn't find me. So my 'GOOD & GREAT FRIEND' A asked her "haven't you heard? She got killed a couple weeks ago, driving to work one sad..." OMG!! Somehow, I was able to hold my laughter back...until S left, and I almost beat the shit out of A...would've if she wasn't pregnant, and bigger than me even if she wouldn'tve been!
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

when life was 'alcohol-soaked'...

First, some favorite links...
Okay...I live life on the computer, unfortunately...don't EVER let anyone tell you, "Oh, you should retire on SS Disability." Not that anyone did that to me...I kept working for 4 years after my dr said I should've....but, STILL!! Grrrrrr....
Anyway...back when Joe was my best, best, best friend I'd ever had in the whole world (1985-1990), we went out and got drunk all the least twice a week. One of the greatest times we had was when we went up to Bowling Green, because his younger brother was in college there, and it was his 21st birthday. So...we got totally trashed, walking up & down the main street, and every bar gave P a free drink, cuz it was his birthday...& we , of course, couldn't let him get drunk by himself, could we?? That would have been RUDE!! (of course, I was a girl, all I had to do was "bat, bat" my eyelashes...& my drinks were free too!) So all three of us walked back to P's dorm room, where Joe & I were staying with him that night. Right after we got there (around 3 am), P got sick & ran to the bathroom. No problem, except he kept puking in the toilet for the next couple hours, & by then I had to pee! And he would NOT let me in!! So, I told Joe, "this is bullshit! come on!". I walked down the hall and went out the fire door to the roof, and decided that was as good a place as any, so I made Joe hold onto my hands, and I leaned back & peed off the roof. However...I didn't know this was gonna happen, I ended up pee-in' onto a lower metal roof~!! And you know, once you start, there's no stopping!! So here's Joe getting his laugh of the evening, and I was...believe it or not, a little embarrassed. Not for long, though...I've since prided myself on being the 'embarrasser', not the 'embarrassee'!
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

Monday, April 25, 2005


test.. I am nerdier than 38% of all people. Are you nerdier? Click here to find out! This is fun...not...


Some really funny shit we were talking about this weekend...(well, funny to the people that DID it...not always to the 'recipient' of the humor...!).
--- Kev & I put some of those '4th of July popper thingys' that you throw down & they pop, under the toilet seat when Tiffany was 10, and she was outside doing those popper things with her apropos place for her to be when she got the shit scared out of her! Now THAT was funny, when she came inside to go to the bathroom, and we heard "pop", a few times, then "aaaauuuuugggghhhhh!"
--- Tiffany (nickname-Chief) and I went to Wal-Mart to get the 'non-food' things when she was about 15. I was down at the back of an aisle, she was out in the big 'cross-aisle'...I held up a douche box, and yelled, "Hey Chief! Is this the flavor you wanted??" Evil, I know, but the mom with 3 teenage girls in the aisle whispered "Good one! I'll have to remember that!"
--- When she was 6, and we had just gotten married, we were eating bratwurst for dinner..I sneaked in and threw one in the toilet, and Tiff went in to pee....then all of a sudden, she got up and yelled, "Mommy!! I pooped a bratwurst!!".
--- Before Kev & I even started going out, there was a mouse in my produce cooler at the store. I was deathly scared (city kid...had never even seen a mouse b4!), so the next day, I wore my big, heavy 'hiker boots' to work, and cautiously tiptoed into my backroom. I was walking toward the cooler, and all of a sudden, somebody said "BOO!" behind me...and I SCREAMED! I turned around, and Kevin was standing there, dying laughing! (of course, I called him a shithead! but I still liked him...and his butt!).
--- A couple weeks later, after they caught the mouse, I walked in the produce room again in the morning, and saaw what I thought was a big RAT in my box of lettuce bags! I told the store manaager about it, he went over and PICKED IT UP!! Turns out it was a purple gummy rat that Kev had gone out to Meijer's and gotten just for this!!
--- When Kevin had his own apartment (you know, the one the ex-girlfriend from hell stalked), his brother k, was asleep on the couch one night when Kev came in. Kevin sneaked up to him, and quietly, turned on a flashlight in his eyes, and yelled, "Watch out for the train!!"
Oh my gosh, k was here for steaks Saturday night, for the race, and I mentioned it,and I think we all spit out our food laughing...and that was 20 yrs ago!!

That's it for now...
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!
This is really good!

Saturday, April 23, 2005

1st apartment for me & Tiff, by ourselves...

Okay, here it is...the first apartment Tiffany & I ever moved in after we moved from my mom & dad's house...
I was 19 & Tiff was a little over a year old. I called about an apartment in the newspaper for $250.00 a month...Kind of expensive for me at the time, but....I had never lived by nyself b4, and I was gonna do it, dammit! No matter WHAT!! I looked at it, it only had 1 big bedroom, & a huge bathroom upstairs, & kitchen & living room downstairs. It was a HUGE, ENORMOUS old house, that was so big it was split into 4 apartments that each had an upstairs & downstairs. So I signed a 6 month lease, cuz I absolutely loved the area, a block from where I grew up, 2 blocks from my job...& across the street from the scariest-looking church in Ohio. It actually used to be a big mansion that a family lived in, but after they left there (&, amazingly enough, moved to the house that I grew up in....we bought it from that family in 1966!), it was converted to a big old stone church, with trees, and lots of grass....I actually saw an owl over there one night! (remember, I was a spoiled 'city kid'!).
After we moved in, Tiff & I started unpacking, and poking around inside. I LOVED the bathroom, it had obviously been a bedroom at one time, forever ago. It had a big clothes-type closet on one wall, and enough empty floor space in the middle that I could put my bentwood rocker in there (so I could read to Tiff while she took a bath, ya know?). About a week later, I met the neighbor in the next door apartment. And my friends from high school came over, and we sat around on MY PORCH!, after I put Tiff to bed, & know, way back in the 'olden days' when you could drink beer at 19! Then it started raining, so we went inside, and poked around some more. Then we went upstairs, and at the end of the hall was a door, with a padlock on it! So...there was an attic up there, too!! So, we unlocked the door, my friends were getting all excited, saying that if it was big enough, could they move in too?? We walk up the stairs (& YES, it was dark & scary as hell up there!), and I looked over beside me at the wall by the stairs, & saw...all kinds of pentagram thingys drawn on the wall, and, worst of all, there was a perfect hand painted there, palm-out, and the tip of each finger had a flame coming out of it, & in the middle of the palm was a big red #13 painted!! Holy shit!! We looked thru the rest of the rooms up there, but, thank God, they were empty! We thundered down the steps (yes, we woke Tiffany!), and I turned around and locked the padlock, and NEVER went up there again!! Everybody says I should've moved right then, but, what did I know? Nothing ever happened...except that night, I went to bed after my friends left, I was upstairs in the same room as Tiff (she was still in her crib)...all of a sudden, I heard a knock on the window!! No 911 svc back then, remember? & I went to the window & looked was S, my neighbor, trying to scare me!! He did...
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

...Saturday morning...

...can I continue about how spoiled I am, & lucky, too...(of course I's MY diary!)
So, I was married when I was still in high school, of course because I was pregnant with Tiffany. I graduated in June 1983, & Tiff was born Oct 2, 1983. I stayed home with her for her first year, then realized I hated my life, it wasn't SUPPOSED to be like this! Fuck living in a trailer park! I had been spoiled all my life, & had lost every bit of it when I decided to get married & keep my baby! So, I told him one evening after a year, that I was leaving, with Tiffany. I was down in her room at one end of the trailer, getting her stuff, all of a sudden I heard footsteps coming from the other end, I looked down the hall, and he was walking up the other one with a rifle! I grabbed 'Tiffany Pooh-Bear', and ran outside, across the way, to my friend's trailer. I went in, told her, "He has a GUN!!" (I never even had seen one before...sheltered city kid!) the way...he was 28 & I was only 19! Unbelievably, she looked at her husband and said, "That's crazy! D, go talk to him!!" He looked at me with total horror in his eyes (he didn't like him on his GOOD days!). So I told him no, do not do that, then called Mom & Dad, and they came out & picked me & Tiff up...& yadayadayada, we moved back in with them, but didn't stay more than a week, cuz I STILL couldn't get along with my dad (he's 87 now, and Mom's 82! I think I was an 'oops baby', don't you?). So I got a job (my first one EVER!) at the grocery store as a cashier, making $3.35 an hour (minimum wage), getting about 20-25 hours a week, rented an apartment (scary as HELL...more about that later!). A 'mentor' of mine advised maybe looking into 'Head Start'...I told my mom that, and she said, "But that's for POOR PEOPLE!" Now I think, "WE were poor!!" I got 20 hours a week at 3.35/hour, my rent was $250/month, I had to get the free formula from welfare, had to get on food stamps, only got $40.00 a week child support...OMG!! NEVER was life supposed to be THIS!! But I'm SO glad I had Tiffany at 18, I've never been pregnant since, and I always said after I delivered her, "She's gonna be an only child..." And I stuck to it~! So, I worked my way up to full-time, took over the produce dept, and liked it. Kev was in the meat dept then, and I fell in love with him as soon as I saw him, but only told 1 person (my best friend for the 5 years after my divorce, he won't even talk to me, cuz I married Kevin...Joe worked at the store in this town w/us.). After I took produce, 6 months later I transferred up north, but still lived in town here, & stopped in to talk to Kev all the time! Phew! More later...
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

Friday, April 22, 2005

life is great...

I realized that my life right now, is truly blessed. And my biggest blessing is Kevin! I have to type this in here, because I feel bad if I say too much about it to my friends (those that I'm still in contact with...most melted away after my diagnosis of ms, & I wasn't a 'whole person' anymore.
When Kev and I first started going out, we worked together at the same store, & everyone laughed about it, and said there was no way it would work out, I was too wild, & he, well, he wasn't. We never got in arguments, though, and I quit going out all the time & partying. By the way, when I had, it was when I worked up north, and when I was gone late or overnight, Tiffany always stayed with my mom & dad. So she was far from neglected or ignored! I erred on the side of 'spoildom', if you will...
Anyway, I would tell my best friends about Kev, and they always thought I was bullshitting them, but I wasn't! I'd tell them that if I could, I'd truly clone Kevin, and give one to each of them. It's my opinon that it is SO good that we were good friends for 5 years first, before I ever had any hope of dating him. (he'd had a girlfriend for years, & she always hung around the store, and we all hated her, she was big, & mean...). So I never did anything, except flirt (which was natural for everyone in any store I ever worked at!). I was scared of his girlfriend....turns out, so was he! He finally broke up with first words were "Yeah! It's MY turn!" Once at the beginning of our dating, we went back to his apartment to play Mario Brothers (video games were better back then!). So, all of a sudden, we heard a knock on the front door...Kevin looked out the front window & it was her! Or, 'the ex-girlfriend from hell' as we still to this day, 15 years later, call her!! So, we decided to just be quiet, and stay away from the windows, and maybe she'd give up & go away. She knew by then that he was going out with someone, but she sure as hell didn't know it was me! So we tiptoed around the corner into the dining room, and kinda hunkered down in the corner, snickering. So, everything was all fun & games...then she started going around the house! (it was the downstairs apartment), knocking on every fucking window!! calling "Kevvie, Kevvie!" To this day, I want to rip someone's tongue out if they call him that!! So here we are, crouching in the corner, hiding, and there's his ex, knocking on the windows at 1 in the morning.I leaned over and told Kevin, "You know, we'll probly laugh about this someday..". A few minutes later, somebody started knocking on the back door to the basement...we stayed where we were, knew it wasn't the Fuller brush man, or anything...then she stopped, we thought "whew!". There was another apartment upstairs in this house, and there were stairs connecting them (a converted old house) with a deadbolt on each side. Pretty soon we hear "clomp clomp" coming down the stairs (k had lived there w/Kev for a while, so the neighbor knew her), and knock, knock, it started from THAAT door too!! So we waited that out too, she went away (we thought! duhhhh). All of a sudden, she was beating on the back door to the kitchen/basement again, and it busted open!! Told you she was big, didn't I? So she came barging in to the dining room, saw me, & took a flying leap at me! Luckily, Kevin stepped between us and saved me from being hit by 180 lbs of flying heifer! However, all of a sudden, she hit the ground & grabbed her chest, & yelled 'my heart, my heart!'. And this is Kev's character..he bent over her and said 'are you ok?', & she tried to kick him in the nuts!! and got up & ran after me again! So Kev grabbed her, and told me to go out the front door...I did, and he took her out the back door to get her in his car & take her to her mom's....she broke away from him, and saw me on the front porch, leaped over the wall, and started beating the shit out of my head by pounding it into the BRICK was an old brick house. Luckily, I had really thick hair...but it STILL fuckin' hurt! So he got her off me, took her home to her mom's, then came back, I got in my car after we lauhged about it, went to my mom's, picked up Tiff, and went home & went to biggie! at age 24, what is?
BoUnCeS!! LibbY! very cathartic....

earth day tomorrow...

...I think that means we have to treat everybody like dirt, doesn't it?
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

how i feel today...

...well, I'm still feeling great today (yay!). However, I don't feel normal, or anything....of course, I need to 'get over myself', and realize that, after 10 years and 4 months, that "used to be's don't count anymore...they just stay on the floor 'til you sweep them away." Grrrrr!! I've fallen on my ass twice today, even when I was standing right beside my walker! I'm gonna have the biggest bruise on my left butt cheek, and I'm SURE that will be real attractive!! Oh well, at least it was someplace that had some built in padding...some bounce, if you will! I remember that when my cousin & I were running around & partying together,(age-early 20's), I was at her party in Sycamore, Ohio, and I was (of course, as always) drunker than shit on tequila!! I loved the shit...without a chaser...just a drink of beer would do! ran into a wall in front of about 30 people that were there, and Lori saw that I had ran into my chest...she started dying laughing, and pointed and yelled, "Pray for swelling!!" And I still talk to her...amazing...:-)
She's also the one that took me to a bar in Toledo named 'Charlie's Blind Pig'. It was right across the street from Northern Ohio College for the Blind, and I will never forget their neon sign out was a red pig walking on its back legs (like a person)...and it had black glasses with X's on them that it was wearing...and a fuckin' cane with a white tip! I'd said, "That's tacky!", and the guy sitting in the next booth said, "who's gonna know?". Now that is just wrong!
Of course, it was the best time of my life, the great old politically incorrect 80's! I always dream, at least 4 times a week, in my sleep about working in the store in Fostoria, Ohio, which is where I requested a transfer to after I'd been a produce mgr here in my town for abouut 6 months & heard the girl there was transferring up to one of the stores on Lake Erie. So I got it, but still lived here, cuz Tiff had the best babysitter in the world...and my mom & dad lived here too...1 hour south of that store. I drove an hour in the morning to work everyday, and an hour home every night...I was usually there from 7:30 am to 6 pm...and I did that for 3 years! But, oh my God, did I grow up a lot there! And Tiffany was 2 to 5 years old. Anyway, I think I always start dreaming about it this time of year, because I took the transfer in the beginning of April, God, I still remember that! I still remember how scared I was the first day! But then I found my feet there, and liked it....really had no choice, I NEEDED the job!! Had a baby to feed, remember? So, in my dreams, I NEVER have ms!! And I was unloading the daily produce truck...oh's storming, I gotta get be continued...
Okay...I'm back! After two lightning strikes that actually hit in my BACKYARD!! I was still healthy enough & strong enough (at 108 lbs!....same as now...was only 98 lbs before I built some muscles!) to hand-unload all the trucks that pulled up to the produce backdoor. Last night I dreamed about unloading the 150 bags of potatoes (50 lbs each). And as I was pulling the first skid out to the floor to put out for display, an old lady asked me if there was a guy around to put one on the bottom of her cart...I told her that's ok, I'll get it, and after I did it, she said 'you shouldn't be doing that...some day, your womanparts are going to slide right down your legs!' That was actually said to me in real life, so maybe my memories come back to me in my dreams. I don't know...whatever...most are good memories, though, so it's all good. Well, the rest of the dream I shouldn't get into (it was something only a dumb kid would've done...!)
"We cannot appeal to the conscience of the world when our own conscience is asleep."

Tuesday, April 19, 2005


...good thing to remember...
>>> "The arrow belongs not to the archer when it has once left the bow; the word no longer belongs to the speaker when it has once passed his lips." Wish I'd known it sooner...

"if you're not living on the're taking up too much space!'

ruminating...(now I'm the cow, Op~!)

Well, I'm not liking some of the stuff being said about the new Pope. I'm not a Catholic, so I don't know if I have a right to an opinion...but I do anyway! They're saying "he's very old...very conservative." I think there's a BIG difference between religion and politics! It feels like they're arguing whether he's a Democrat or Republican, fakkrissakes! (oops...probly the wrong place for that expression, huh?)! My feeling is, 'Of course he's conservative! What did they expect? He was a cardinal in the Catholic church! And, from my Catholic friends, of course...that's the epitomy of conservatism!! What do they expect, for the new Pope to come out on the balcony and yell "I won! Sex, & condoms, & abortions on demand for EVERYBODY!! And I can't be fired!! Bwahhhaha" I'd be kind of disappointed in the Catholics if they did that...even though, like I said, I'm not a catholic, it's nice to see them staying with their beliefs.

Sunday, April 17, 2005

thinking...i'm gonna be dangerous soon...

....politics again...I've figured out why I'm much more of a Republican than a Democrat! I'm not rich enough to be a Democrat! They always say that the Democrats are for the 'regular people'...I have yet to see a 'regular person', Democrat or Republican, run for office & even come close to winning, not even in the local elections! Democrats seem to be a lot of the movie stars and directors, who make their money from 'the regular people'. And the Republicans are still being described as 'the rich, white guys'. Hm...I fit exactly one of those criteria...I'm an 'on ss disability, white woman'. Nobody should paint the population with such a broad brush...including me, I guess, as far as my remark about Hollywood! (sorry). I remember once when I was about 6 or 7, and my mom (a totally strict Democrat, compared to my dad, who was always a total Republican! Where did they find me?) came home from our next-door neighbor's house, burning up & fuming..."I can't believe Helen thinks we shouldn't take care of the poorer people that much! They're so disadvantaged, we HAVE to!" Well, I, in my infinite 7 year old wisdom, said, "But, Mommy, we learned in school that "all men are created equal..." That let loose a lecture about how the rich were holding down the poor, etc, etc...Yeah...this from a woman who never had to work after she married, had a maid once a week, shopped every single day, etc again! Oh & let live. We get along, for the most part, except at election time! However, she thinks Hillary Clinton is the 'be-all & end-all', and LOVES her book, Living History. I've asked her to swap with me for a week, cuz I'd read it...but only if she reads 'Rewriting History" by Dick luck yet, but I'm still trying!!
"The greatest victory a man can win is victory over himself."
Johann Heinrich Pestalozzi

BoUnCeS!! LibbY!
Also...a fun link, not a weird one today! Good time waster!!

Saturday, April 16, 2005

Oh, I forgot...

...more weird sites...
Yeah...this is weird shit, for sure! The key to life everything...but definitely DO NOT believe everything!!
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

what's up, world??

Well, I feel MUCH better today!! I went to bed at 4:30 am, and slept straight through til 4:30 pm! Now, my only problem will be getting to sleep tonight, since I had to take my 60 mg of prednisone at 4:45! :-D
The first thing I did was turn on Fox News (that's akin to saying I turned on my oxygen for the day...) Anyway, there have been so many stories lately about child molesters, sexual predators,'s a's my belief that there's a difference between 'sexual predators', if they're guys (or girls) that are, oh, in their 20's & date a person under 18, 17, like that. Or a 'child molester' who targets a little kid under, oh, say 12, 13, 14, etc....or younger! It's pretty well-known that child molesters cannot be cured (among psychologists), it's more of a pathological problem. But, I'll give the opposite side the benefit of the doubt, if that's the "p c" thing to do these days. Let's compromise on this...if they get convicted, whether sentenced to life or death, send them to live in the prison's general population for however long it is, no more private cells for them to live in to keep them 'safe' (the kids didn't get that, did they now??). BUT...they should have to wear PINK shirts in there for the rest of their life. Which, may I say, would most likely be shorter than they expected, right? Tell me what's wrong with that, huh?

Friday, April 15, 2005

stupid things to look at on the web...

Hey, does anyone else on here ever stay up & go to bed around 1 or 2 am, and listen to Coast To Coast AM on the radio with George Noory? It used to be Art Bell that hosted it, and it talks about all kinds of weird shit, like ghosts, ufo's, Roswell, Bigfoot, weird stations on shortwave radios, etc..or, the one where they played the 'sounds of people's souls screaming in hell' because they had lowered a microphone down a hole in the ground in Siberia miles & miles deep. Actually, it kinda sounded like a bar closing down for the night...
Anyway, now besides listening to the show (it's on from 1 am til 4 or 5 am every night), I'm hooked on checking out the website a lot! So here's the link, if anyone's interested (if not, please tell me...I don't want to be offensive here). I just like weird know, Halloween's always fun to make a haunted porch for the kids to have to come up on to get their candy! And dumb things like that....and no, I'm NOT a "devil-worshiper" or anything...I just think it's fun to get scared! Enjoy!
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

done with the speed in my veins!

Well, it's over!! No more days of the nurse having to find my teeny little veins!! Good thing I only do that once or twice a year! I just hope it keeps me feeling better for a while...Kevin says from what he sees, it doesn't improve my symptoms a lot, but it gives me more strength to fight the shit!
Anyway, I am SO lucky he will be with me through this whole thing! We've been married 15 years. We worked at the same place for 5 years before we ever thought seriously about going out, then started dating in Oct '89, on Tiff''s 6th birthday, took vacation the same week in Feb '90, & went to a mall in Columbus on Feb 13, a 6 pm news show put us on tv about looking at Valentine's Day gifts...then when the news guy asked each of us what we were getting the other, I said I wasn't sure, & Kev leaned over & whispered in his ear. The news guy said "oh, ok, thanks guys" and ran away from us over to the camera, where he proceeded to tell all of central Ohio that "they're getting married for Valentine's Day!!" So, after we got back to my apartment that night, the phone was ringing off the hook, but Kev wouldn't let me answer it! Then he did the 'down on one knee' thing to propose! So romantic!! Then we went out Wed the 14th & bought our rings, went to the courthouse & got the license Thurs, and went to City Hall & got married Fri Feb 16th 1990! And I had emailed the tv station in January this year that had had us on, & asked them if there was any possible way they still had a copy so I could make a dvd of it (with background music added & everything!). And, unbelievably, their guy in charge of the archived videos found it!! And sent it here in 2 days, and refused when I offered to pay for the shipping...and enclosed a note from everyone at the station saying congratulations, & they're proud it started on their airwaves! And, oh yeah, the video guy found the video stored at the...Ohio Historical Society!! OMG!
Okay...can you tell I'm 'speedy' from the drugs? And, yes,they're legal!
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Disregard the previous two....I didn't put them there!!
Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.
Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Sunday, April 10, 2005

April 10...already!!

Wow!! This is the kind of weather I've been waiting for! It's in the low 70's here at 3:00 pm, and totally SUNNY!! And this almost never happens anytime in central Ohio! I think we have almost as many rainy, gloomy days as Seattle. The only difference is, it's prettier there!
Anyway...I saw my ms doctor at the Cleveland Clinic last Tuesday. We talked about how things are going, I said I'm depressed, she asked if I'm suicidal, I said, no, it'd be more likely that I'd be homicidal. HA! So, we can't increase my anti-depresssants, cuz that might cause seizures (which totally SUCK!), but starting tomorrow, I'm getting 3 days of iv steroids, which will definitely help my mood! Woo-hoo!! Liquid speed, directly into my veins!! No, they're not the kind baseball players take (in other words, I won't grow a penis or a beard, or anythng!), but it's something, anyway. So, til I start 'em...

Saturday, April 02, 2005

today really sucks..

Bored, bored, bored!! I'm really getting fucking frustrated with this ms shit! I can't believe the number of people that think it'd be GREAT not to have to get up every day and go to work! How boring of a life do they want?? I actually felt like I was worth something when I had a all I can do is sit here in this house all day, because, of course, I can't drive anymore because my eyes aren't good enough. So...I can still read, watch tv, but I can't do anything around the house, like even run the sweeper, cuz my balance is so fucking bad, I fall down every time I try! Huh...never thought I'd WISH to be able to do that! Now I get to sit here 24/7, get paid by social security disability (yes, I'm on the 'dole!' Which actually feels like only 1/2 a step up from welfare, because of the EXCUSES people use to get it! Unlike welfare, where people have to have another baby to neglect before they get more money!).

I don't know if any of you have ever worked in a grocery store, but I used to (back when I was a whole person, and got a raise for good work, not just got the same amt of $$ every month). Anyway...I always used to bitch to my mom, because the same people came in every month (once a month...when they got their food stamps!), and, regularly had one more baby ready to pop out! After a few years, suddenly, one of the oldest 'kids' came in hugely generation of welfare recipients is born...and here I was doing all I could to make enough money to take care of Tiff, when she was 2! Now I'm not saying welfare & food stamps are's just when they're depended on for years & years!!

All right, that's enough attitude for now...guess I'll go see if I can learn something, on history, wars, the constitution....something.